The Honeymoon Is Over

Well, let's see. It's been two weeks since my last post. My bad, folks. To the many members of the Nate Dogg Cult of Personality (aka, my blog readership), I issue my sincerest apologies. However, you have to understand that this is all part of what I like to call "The Blog Lifecycle." I developed this theory through detailed observation of other blogs and, sure enough, Universal Traveler is following the same pattern. The progression of The Blog Lifecycle usually goes something like this:

• Someone thinks to him or herself, "Hey, I have a pretty interesting life. I bet my friends and family are dying to know who I saw a movie with last night, why I love tofu, what things really, really irritate me, and how I like to procrastinate when I should be studying/working instead. I should start a blog!" Said person becomes a "blogger."
• Blogger creates blog, writes an awkward, stream-of-consciousness first post about how they "can't believe they are doing this," or how they're "jumping on the bandwagon."
• After a few posts, the blogger suddenly realizes he/she has nothing important to say. The blog enters a stagnant period. Statistics indicate that 95% of all blogs are abandoned at this point (Source: The American Blogging Consortium [ABC]).
• If the blogger is part of the other 5%, he/she unleashes a flurry of posts. This stage, when the blogger gets in touch with his/her muse, is known as "The Honeymoon."
• After the initial rush of creativity subsides, the blog again begins to stagnate. The honeymoon has come to an end. During this period, bloggers may feel that "things are moving too fast," and often express a desire to "take a break" or "see other blogs."
• Eventually, blogger and blog patch up their differences, and the period of disunity ends. Blogger continues to post until he/she a) becomes bored and/or burnt out, b) realizes nobody is reading anymore, or c) meets an untimely demise in a freak accident involving a Sno-Cone machine and a dancing bear named Clarence.

I think that, for Universal Traveler, the honeymoon was pretty much all of New Zealand. Now the honeymoon is over. I've spent the past two weeks soul-searching and ruminating, pondering what the future holds for my blog and me. Well, I am happy to report that this introspective period was just what I needed. My blog and I are back together and stronger than ever! From here on out, it's nothing but sunshine, lollipops, and posts by the score! Chim-chim-cheree!

Alright, now that I've met my bullshit quota, I'll briefly fill everyone in on what's been going on for the past two weeks. When I last posted, I was still in Nelson, about to fly back to Auckland for one last fling before my flight back to the States. Well, after getting to Auckland, I jumped on a bus and headed straight up to Paihia, which is a resort-ish town on the Bay of Islands, about 3.5 hours north of Auckland. I didn't have any big plans for my time here, other than to relax and enjoy my last days in the Land of the Long White Cloud.

And that's exactly what I did. On my first full day in Paihia, I went for a day-sail on the R. Tucker Thompson, a replica of a classic 19th-century tallship. We were fortunate enough to have steady winds that day, allowing us to raise all the sails and cruise around the bay in relative silence. This is in contrast to the majority of the Bay of Islands cruise operations, which zoom around in motor boats, each one making a stop at the hallowed "Hole in the Rock" (yes, it's just a big hole in an even bigger rock, but you can ride a boat through the hole, which somehow bowls people over). Anyways, it was a very relaxing way to spend an afternoon, and a good way to take a look around the bay.

Well, that first day was definitely the most ambitious of the five or six (who's counting?) I spent in Paihia. The rest of the time, I indulged in the time-honored backpacking tradition known as "hanging out." I was fortunate to meet a great group of people at my hostel, many of whom were also getting ready to fly out of New Zealand. Each morning we would wake up and tuck into the *FREE* breakfast provided by the hostel, following it up with extended periods of lounging, chatting, wandering, and card-playing. We played an obscene number of rounds of a card game called "Shithead," which seems to be popular on the NZ backpacker circuit. If anyone is curious I'd be happy to explain the rules, but at its most basic level, Shithead can be described as follows:

• In Shithead, there are no winners...only shitheads.
• MILO® is the official beverage of Shithead.

It used to be that the essence of Shithead could be distilled down to a single rule, but, for reasons to complex to describe here, I added the second one.

Anyways, I won't bore you with the details of the rest of my stay in Paihia, because not much happened. And that's exactly how I wanted it. I flew back to the States on the 13th, and honestly, not a whole lot is happening here, either, with one exception. There is a new member of the Deam family. His name is Karl, and he's a Standard Poodle puppy. Here's a pic for you to gush over: